Walking in the darkness of night, heart retching, trying to absorb the sense that the one who held her heart completely was so violently snatched from her arms. Reeling in adrenaline and insecurities, reaching for retribution, reasoning and strength. Too hard to let that love slip away, too easy to hope for another day. Looking and longing to understand to find another soul to comprehend at this crossroads filled with anxiety and pain. Needing that feeling to live again.
As the heart races in panic, stomach drops weightless inside, as the tears are held back yet glisten sorrowful eyes. Hands shaking with uncertain trembles, shallow breaths as the throat dries and narrows at the pain that is held, stars cross her eyes. Emotions remain unspoken as the tinge of blood taints the tongue from biting down to steady the repugnance that might be set free.
Words are in unison whispered and uttered in poisonous tongue, lashing and gashing at the soul of one. “Stupid worthless good for nothing cunt” Is all she hears sprayed through spittle from the guy she thought she knew. Watching as the world spins round, knowing there is nothing left to be found. When words are laced with silver and led, when the heart has all but been bled.
Wondering at what lays ahead, where is the will and strength of yesterday. Has that gone cold too and left dismay, for nothing in human will is good enough to stay. Cold hardness stings across the skin, swollen and darkened and ripping flesh, down she falls. No one to hear the shallow cries, no one at all.
There’s no hope in this world, nothing left at all. As crimson drips fill the eyes and a searing pain screams through torn flesh as it’s tender now and swelling fast. Sobbing with resistant thrashing as a slicing burn sets free from her throat, just let this be, she thinks just let this set you free.
Scraping flesh as her elbows grind upon gravel and the blade sets in and true pain begins. Screaming in silence as no sounds form, the aerated froth came in gurgles spewing from her throat, as the bloody rouge cascades over her chest, soaking her in wet warmth. A foggy consciousness between wake and dream, a nightmare or so it seems.
The attempt to remain lucid and not fall into the enclosing dark, the ripping and tearing of her flesh riveting her body in overwhelming pain. As the red sets in how can this happen, how did this begin. Her mind chasing thoughts and memories In the place between life and death, stay awake, stay awake for one’s own sake.
The metallic taste on the tongue as it swells the. The feeling as her will and desire of strength slowly fade. The pain too intense to attempt even the tiniest of movements, striving to scream, failing in gurgled guttural mutters. Once his deed was exhausted as he scampered away, the sound the souls of his shoes made on the pavement echoed like haunting ghostly gasps.
Looking for redemption, a gleam maybe so far away. Yes, for it is the only way. Reaching and pleading as every muscle cramped in pain, what seems like eons as the stake has been claimed. Peering through the slits left black and tinged deep red, no longer seeing the blood as it disgorged down her neck and over bosoms left bare.
“Are you an angel, it’s that far gone?” it never crossed her lips in form. Clinging to this beautiful soul begging for life between muffled cries. For the remnant of existence left to ponder the why.
As her world, depleted and fleeted from her shell the sound of rambling mufflers rang in her ears, the smell of blood, sweat and exhaust filled her senses as she slowly began to let go. “Hold on honey, hold on” the last raspy words that rang in her ear as she felt his cool smooth gloves slip behind her head.
She opened her eyes with barely slits for her view. As she strained to speak, there were no words that came. The pain coursed through every pore. Unable to see, no words to speak her attempts to move impossible, everything was torn, bruised and broken. Though she could barely make out the black boots that stood by her bedside, her heart quickened and panic began to take hold. “Relax honey your okay”. The raspy voice and the leather gloved hand of the angel man as her tears began to flow. There is beauty in the darkness where heroes come to light.